Because Apparently, Beer Now Competes With Dessert
In an era where the line between breakfast cereal and IPA becomes increasingly blurred, WeldWerks Brewing Co. takes a bold leap forward (or backward, depending on your stance on adulting) with their latest concoction: "Kid In A Candy Store," a Milk Stout that dares to ask, "Why drink your calories when you can chew them?"
Let's set the scene: You're wandering the aisles of your local craft beer emporium, your eyes glazed over from the endless parade of hop puns and label art that looks suspiciously like it was lifted from a high school band's notebook. Just as you're about to give up and grab a six-pack of something that doesn't require a thesaurus to appreciate, you spot it—Kid In A Candy Store. The name alone evokes a nostalgia so potent, you can almost hear the faint rustle of candy wrappers and the distant echoes of your dentist tut-tutting.
WeldWerks Brewing Co., in their infinite wisdom, has decided that what the beer-drinking public really needs is to regress to their childhood, albeit with a significantly higher ABV. This Milk Stout is not just a beer; it's a time machine, transporting you back to a simpler time when your biggest worry was whether you'd get a cavity from your Halloween haul.
But let's talk about the beer itself. "Kid In A Candy Store" is brewed with all the subtlety of a sugar rush on Christmas morning. The first sip is an assault on the senses, a cacophony of chocolate, vanilla, and what can only be described as the distilled essence of every "E numbers" laden treat you were denied as a child. It's sweet, it's creamy, and it's about as far from a traditional stout as you can get without actually being a milkshake.
And yet, there's something undeniably compelling about it. Perhaps it's the way WeldWerks has unapologetically embraced the absurdity of the craft beer arms race, pushing the envelope until it tears open, spilling forth a torrent of lactose and nostalgia. Or maybe it's just the fact that, deep down, we're all just kids in a candy store, yearning for a taste of the forbidden fruits (or candies) of our youth.
In conclusion, "Kid In A Candy Store" is a testament to the craft beer industry's ongoing quest to blur the lines between beverage and dessert, adulthood and childhood, sobriety and, well, a really fun Friday night. It's a beer that doesn't just ask you to drink it; it demands that you savor it, reflect on it, and maybe even share it with that inner child who's been neglected in favor of things like "responsibility" and "a balanced diet."
So here's to WeldWerks and their audacious brew, a reminder that sometimes, to find the joy in life, you need to look back as well as forward. Cheers, or, more appropriately, "Here's to never growing up!"
Cheers you, silly Bastards!
