When Craft Beer Decides to Go Back to Kindergarten

Welcome to the latest chapter in the never-ending craft beer saga, where breweries seem to compete for the "Most Likely to Confuse Your Taste Buds" award. Today's contender? Alphabetical Lager from Hopewell Brewing Co., a beer that promises a crash course in the alphabet with every sip. Because, evidently, drinking beer wasn't educational enough already.

In an industry that has already brought us brews infused with everything from bacon to bull testicles, Hopewell Brewing Co. decided to take a step back. "Let's keep it simple," they presumably said, opting instead for a name that harks back to kindergarten. Because nothing says "refreshing lager" quite like reminiscing about the days when your biggest worry was whether you'd get to nap time without an incident.

"Alphabetical" isn't just a name; it's a concept, a philosophy, a way of life. It's Hopewell Brewing Co.'s attempt to merge the worlds of literacy and lager, proving once and for all that beer can be both your drink of choice and a subtle reminder of your ABCs. This Lupo Lager is their manifesto, a declaration that yes, even your beer can be pretentious.

What's a Lupo Lager, you ask? Ah, it's the latest in a long line of beer styles you didn't know you needed to be familiar with. Crafted with the elusive Lupo hop, it's designed to add yet another layer of complexity to your drinking experience. Because God forbid you have a beer that doesn't require a Google search to fully appreciate.

Diving into the flavor profile of Alphabetical Lager is like taking a journey through the very fabric of brewing itself. Each sip spells out a different letter, starting with "A" for "Are you sure this isn't just a regular lager?" and ending with "Z" for "Zero reasons not to enjoy." It's crisp, it's clean, and it's infused with just enough pretension to make you feel superior for drinking it.

But the real question on everyone's mind: does it pair well with alphabet soup? Finally, a beer that complements your nostalgic canned-food dinners. It's the circle of life, or at least the circle of craft beer: a return to simplicity, but with an added twist that ensures you'll pay twice as much for the privilege.

In the end, Alphabetical Lager stands as a testament to Hopewell Brewing Co.'s dedication to pushing the boundaries of what beer can be. It's a reminder that in the craft beer industry, no idea is too outlandish, no concept too far-fetched. It's a beer for those who appreciate the finer things in life, like literacy and hops.

So here's to "Alphabetical," the lager that dared to dream, dared to educate, and dared to ask the question: "What if we named a beer after the most basic foundation of language?" Cheers to that, and may your drinking always be as enlightening as it is intoxicating.


Cheers you, silly Bastards!

Bamms Money Malone

Hailing from the heart of the city where the beats are as hard as the streets, Bamms Money Malone, known in the ring and on the mic as "The Vanilla Gorilla," stands as a towering figure of raw strength and unbridled talent. Born with the name Bamms Money Malone, he swiftly outgrew the bounds of normalcy, forging his own path with the ferocity of a silverback and the swagger of a street-savvy entrepreneur.

https://www.christramos.com/
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